My Story
- Renate Stoiber
- Apr 25
- 4 min read
If you checked out my About Me page on my website, you got a glimpse already. If you want to know a little more, read on—this blog post is for you.
From Heimat to the Land of Opportunities
I spent the first 30 years of my life in Germany, where I had the wonderful opportunity to participate in an exchange program as part of my computer science studies.
Being fairly adventurous, I jumped right in and spent a year in the Midwest, and drove through almost all states. That's when I fell in love with the country and its people. The logical next move was to find a company in Germany that would sponsor a move to the US. So, that's exactly what I did. After working for three years in Germany, I transitioned to the US.
A Pivot I Didn’t Expect
There was a bit of a glitch, so I had to pivot quickly, and it ended up being with a different company. I don’t know about you, but I find my life rarely ever works out as planned, and this quite unexpected change was rather nerve-wrecking and scary as it unfolded. But since I’m writing from the US 25 years later, we know it ended well.
Culture Shock and Silicon Valley Survival
When I arrived in the San Francisco Bay Area it quickly became rather apparent that life was nothing like the Midwest. Speak about culture shock! Do you know what I mean?
Working in the Tech industry for me meant being on practically 24x7. As the sole breadwinner and being on a visa I felt trapped. I had to perform, no matter what.
Alone in a Crowd
With all this constant mad rush, there was no room for social activities, making friends and building relationships. I felt alone, without any support system, and no friends to do life with. To enjoy the good times, and support each other through the rough patches. I had, and thankfully to this day still have all of this in Germany. But here we were, nearly 6000 miles away and 9 hours behind, with no apparent solution in sight.
A year later my first son was born. Not surprisingly, work and a newborn didn't precisely help the relationship dilemma, but something had to happen, since I became exceedingly unhappy.
Finding Community in Unexpected Places
My solution was an online search for a church. Mind you, Google was only founded two years earlier, so search engines weren't quite what they are today. But by divine intervention, I found a wonderful church with "Community" in the name, which was exactly what I was looking for. Twenty-five years later, this was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. But that is a story for another time.
I found wonderful people, built deep lasting relationships, and had another son. So everything should have been great, right? But there was work...
Work: A Love-Hate Relationship
My son keeps encouraging me to write a book about my work experiences; apparently, it could become another "Office". But I won't do that, and I also won't go into any details. Many of us have experienced the highs and lows and everything in between in Corporate America, so you can just insert your own story. I tried a number of different things. Some I enjoyed; others were pure torture. But, through it all, I built wonderful, lasting relationships, learned invaluable lessons, and had many experiences I wouldn't trade for anything.
A Home Emptied, A Life Reimagined
As important as relationships are to me, sometimes they just don't stand the test of time, and at the beginning of the pandemic, I found myself single for the first time in my life. My wonderful sons were living their own lives and in less than a year, I went from a full house of four to living alone. I openly admit that it was a bit of an adjustment at first. As I tend to do when I find myself in the storms of life, I lean heavily on my faith, and the wonderful friendships I had built.
From Tech to Transformation
This previous chapter of my life had to come to an end and made room for my own transformation as I worked my way through 15 months of coaching training at Western Seminary, while working full time in Tech. I always admired people who manage to work and go to school. I didn’t think I could do it. Yet here we are, a wonderful experience, amazing new friends and a coaching certificate later.
A New Chapter Has Begun
And if all that weren’t enough, I recently returned from a four-and-a-half-month journey of travel and volunteering across Asia and Europe—a deeply enriching experience that filled me with gratitude and fresh perspective. You can read more about it in my travel blog.
For me, few things compare to the joy of exploring new places, connecting with people from different walks of life, and embracing the unexpected along the way.
From the bottom of my heart, I resonate with the words of C.S. Lewis:
“There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.”
With gratitude,
Renate
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